“When people allow you to know about their pain and talk about it, take your shoes off, it’s a holy place. Be humble, be kind when someone shows you vulnerability.” ~ Amani Albair
I am so passionate about the work I do.
Because I know what happens within your body, heart and mind when you begin to heal your younger parts, feel better from the inside, move beyond patterns in your relationships and your life that make you feel stuck and are holding you back.
This body-focused healing, attachment and parts work (healing your younger parts) supports you to heal early developmental hidden trauma from your family trauma imprint, childhood emotional neglect, societal conditioning, and intergenerational trauma. With time and attention, we experience important shifts – how we feel inside of our bodies, how we live within our relationships, and how we relate to our inner and outer world.
Many of the wonderful people I work with would like something to be different in some way, and they have been putting other people’s expectations ahead of their own, silencing their dreams, so they could feel accepted and safe. Instead of belonging, this can feel more disconnected, frustrating and exhausting.
When we are living in these unconscious patterns, our health can suffer, our relationships can suffer and we can develop chronic illness. The root cause of our struggles, is often a deep disconnection from ourselves. We can learn to face what we have been avoiding. Notice our inner world and our unconscious limiting beliefs and societal conditioning about what we feel is appropriate for women in relationships, at work and at home.
We are not to BLAME. It is our responsibility to heal our pain, so we don’t suffer and don’t place our suffering on others – and it’s not our fault we are in pain.
Our beliefs make us feel that we aren’t good enough, and that we are broken in some way. Our harsh inner dialogue puts relentless pressure on ourselves and our nervous system – the bridge between our unconscious mind, our body and our emotions. No external solution can resolve the struggles that come from within ourselves – support, touch, time for healing and new understanding can.
When healing happens, our world softens from within – our trauma softens and shifts – and we don’t feel as tightly held by the tension and grip that holds us from within. Shifts begin to happen and we can begin to see glimmers of our authentic selves for the first time.
We discover some of our traits that we may have hidden – which could be some of our greatest strengths. When we stop conforming to others expectations, we can find clarity, wisdom, freedom and purpose.
When you free yourself from deeply held early developmental, hidden trauma and limiting beliefs, we can feel better and truly thrive in life. Chronic illness improves, relationships deepen and confidence and fulfillment skyrockets. A new way of living and thriving begins.
Without realizing it, we have buried our earliest trauma – and this unprocessed pain lives on within us, like an unexploded charge, disrupting our physical, mental, and emotional health. When we treat trauma as the enemy, avoiding it or pushing it away, we inadvertently give it more power.
Trauma, simply put, is any experience that overwhelms our nervous system, leaving us stuck in a cycle of stress. In response, our body releases adrenaline, cortisol, and other survival hormones to mobilize us for fight, flight, or freeze. But when this stress cycle is never completed, those hormones remain trapped, creating a toxic, chronic state that impacts our well-being.
Healing invites us to complete the stress response cycle—to allow our bodies and minds to process, in the present, what once felt too overwhelming. Instead of turning away from sorrow, fear, or anger, we gently lean in, permitting our bodies to experience, express, and release what’s been keeping us stuck in survival mode.
Healing isn’t about fighting the trauma within us; it’s about allowing ourselves to feel, process, and expel it, making room to enjoy life to the fullest.
One of the things I love about meeting with people is that I get to watch their lives blossom—once their entanglements with repetitive and stressful deeply held feelings are released, they can subside. They tell me they feel more spacious, calmer, and quieter inside. They begin to handle situations in their lives with greater ease without getting thrown off by emotional reactivity.
No longer lost in analyzing others’ behaviour or dissecting every feeling, there’s space for something else. And that “something else” is the expression of the naturally generous heart.
What does that look like? Here’s what can happen:
You show up present and available rather than distracted and in your head.
You listen deeply and with care, without your own agenda in the way.
You stop blaming and feel compassion for yourself and others’ suffering instead.
You want to help—not to get anything back or have an impact—but simply as a natural movement in response to others’ needs. You’re not attached to the outcomes.
And you’re lovingly open to your partner, children, loved ones, and everyone you come into contact with.
I encourage you to be on the lookout for the expressions of your naturally generous heart. Because these are reflections of the essence of who you are.
You don’t become more generous and open. You don’t evolve into being something different than who you are right now. It’s much simpler than that.
You realize that, behind the fog of your personal fears and needs, you’re just here, present, not stuck in thoughts about yourself and fully available to life.
You discover your boundless nature that is and always has been who you are—you were just too distracted to know it.
Your heart may sometimes feel bruised and vulnerable, and that’s okay. Fully love the parts of you that need your kind attention.
Because when the time is right and there’s enough space and silence, love begins to express itself effortlessly.
And your natural generosity will flow everywhere.
We feel most satisfied in our relationships when our needs are met. And yet…
Many of our relational needs come from childhood trauma. The issue with this is that we use the other person for soothing – and this leads to codependency.
The greatest clue regarding where your need comes from is the energy you feel behind it.
If it is one of neediness and desperation (a very intense feeling in your body of constriction, anxiety, heaviness), take the time for healing and soothing yourself. Because otherwise, the person on the other side will become your new parent.
They will become the ones to soothe you, instead of a partner in your life journey to encourage your growth.
And you might find yourself staying in these relationships just to get soothed, while in reality you feel unfulfilled and many of your other very important needs are not getting met.
It is always a tradeoff – we will never get ALL of our needs met in our relationships, and we want to really understand our current relational needs and how we are getting them met.
I guess, it makes me wonder, do we always know what we want or even what is possible?
Maybe more so, do we leap when it is offered to us even if that leap is hard?
When BIG change is needed in our lives, why do so many accept it only when it is easy?
The universe has our back, BUT it also will test our will, wherever you have the old program that says “this is why my life is stuck” it will challenge you there – so if it is time, then time will be your obstacle, if it is a relationship in your life, then that relationship will become your obstacle, same for beliefs, food issues, money, support…the list goes on.
You know what the universe is waiting for?
It wants to see how badly you want out of whatever you are experiencing, and how willing you are to stretch for it. That stretch is key, are you willing to do whatever it takes? To leave comfort, to do the unexpected and maybe even what is to others illogical to get there?
When I look at my life and the lives of those I have had the good fortune to support, I am amazed at what my clients will do for their mental and physical wellness, and when they did, the universe responded by thrusting what they needed into their path.
Remember, the Universe has been waiting for us to recognize our power, to decide that enough is enough, and take action, and get so committed, that NOTHING can stand in our way.
What would happen to your life if you accepted this challenge?
