Emotional Intimacy – Cultivating Deeper, More Satisfying Relationships

December 16, 2014

How well do you know yourself?
Do you pay attention to and take care of yourself?

Cultivating emotional intimacy with others is the culmination of your own self-care ~ how well you pay attention to and act on what your body, mind and soul is telling you.

For example, allowing yourself to rest and sleep when we need to, to eat healthy foods, to let go of old patterns of behaviour, and to surround yourself with healthy relationships, such as friends and family.

When we identify our own individual obstacles to intimacy, we can also overcome these obstacles.

Your childhood emotional injuries are the “defenses” that you needed at the time, as a way of protecting yourself.

If you have “defended” yourself in relationships for as long as you can remember, you may not be sure how to get intimately close to people in your adult life.

You can increase your inner space—the sense of openness you feel, for example, after an emotionally draining relationship, as if a weight has been lifted off your shoulders.

Some of the ways to expand your inner space include participating in: therapy, yoga, meditation, dance, even physically clearing/cleaning out your home. 

These practices help to release the tightness you may feel within you – physically and emotionally.

If you attend to this process daily, it can lead to sustainable personal happiness, which allows you to be a better, more intimate partner to another.

You hold the key within you to having a more fulfilling relationships.

Start by becoming a good “partner” to yourself first.

If we are seeking a partner for a long-term relationship, we need to ask these questions of them:

Are they interested in intimacy?
Are they committed to working on themselves?
Are they focused on respect and reciprocation?
Do they have a healthy sense of entitlement, i.e., humble versus self-serving?
Are they conscious and protective of their own healthy boundaries?

These five questions alone can change your thinking about relationships.

In relationships ~ what many people have begun to realize is that developing and cultivating intimacy isn’t a small thing—it’s everything. The more you deepen the relationship with yourself, the better foundation you will be building for a peaceful, calm life for yourself, and the closer you will be towards finding a great partner to build an exceptional relationship with.

Many of us have defended ourselves for a long time, and while we long for emotional closeness, we may also be afraid of it.

We may not be responsible for where our fear has come from, but we can take responsibility for what we do about it.

Perhaps there was a lack of intimacy between your parents, or perhaps you learned this fear unconsciously from them. Regardless of where you learned to fear intimacy, the point is you can learn to trust, soften your defenses, pay attention to your emotional and physical needs ~ and create the conditions for deeper, closer and more emotionally intimate relationships.

I look forward to supporting you along the way. 

[email protected] or 647 222-3086
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